War leads to Death. Death comes by Suicide. Prince John has a secret that has been revealed. Unable to live with that revelation, he must now die.
As I delve into the final stages of crafting Braxton’s Century, the last installment in the historical dystopia series, I find myself seeking your valuable input. In this novel, John’s letter plays a pivotal role, serving various purposes. I kindly invite you to share your thoughts on the letter, focusing on its writing style and the messages it conveys. Your comments are highly appreciated, and I encourage you to provide feedback after the letter. Thank you for your input.
PLEASE REMEMBER THIS IS WRITTEN IN A MORE FORMAL SYLE BY AN ARISTOCRAT IN 1818.
The letter follows the brief intro at the beginning of a chapter:
Upon Braxton’s arrival at the Aurelio Palace, he found a diplomatic pouch waiting for him. Having just returned from Prince John’s funeral at Windsor Castle earlier in the day. Braxton and Valentina handed of their coats to a footman and walked towards the stairs.
“I entrust you to your matters, my dear,” Valentina said. “Please do not be too long. It is late. These past days have been trying.” She patted his forearm. “You need your rest.”
He took her hand in his and placed a kiss on her forehead. “I agree. These last days have been arduous. I will be up once I have dealt with whatever matters require my attention.”
They exchanged smiles and went their separate ways, she to her suite of rooms and he to the ducal study.
Braxton tended to the fire and then extracted a key from his waistcoat to unlock the leather satchel. He inserted the key. The lock clicked as he turned the key, releasing the latch. The prince bent back the flap, reached in, and withdrew a thick cream-colored envelope.
He gasped. The envelope bore his deceased brother’s seal, Prince John’s, seal.
Prince Braxton dropped into his leather desk chair and cracked open the wax. He withdrew the pages from the envelope. The prince grunted and pulled a pair of glasses from his coat pocket, fumbled them onto his nose, and read.
My Dearest Braxton,
You have likely received this letter not long after my passing. I find myself overwhelmed with remorse for the burden I have placed upon you and our family. Most of all, I regret my actions will disrupt the course of your life, forever crowning you with a weighty responsibility: that of remaining regent and very likely becoming king. I can only hope that, in time, you find it in your heart to forgive me.
Braxton, I must share a grave revelation. It is because of this I have been forced to take matters into my own hands. My relationship with Robert is no longer a secret; it festers among the men in the trenches.
And so, I find myself and the family in an untenable situation. The repercussions of exposing the future king as a homosexual on the battlefield would be catastrophic. The government, our family, and the monarchy would not survive the accusation in the midst of a war. I am left with no recourse.
I am telling you this because you are entitled to an explanation, and I trust you will ensure my life was not lived in vain.
Importantly, you must destroy this correspondence once you have read it.
We can both acknowledge that our king and brother, Dominic, has allowed himself to be consumed by grief over the loss of his son, the crown prince Adolphus. That you and I have served as regents highlights Dominic’s vulnerability both mentally and physically.
Circumstances have forced me to remove myself from succession. The truth is, I could not in good conscience allow myself to be crowned king, knowing that if my true nature were revealed, it could bring about the downfall of the monarchy.
I have confidence that you will uphold the honor of our family and, as king, fortify the crown.
I am tormented by the realization that the world may only remember me as a two-dimensional hero. While showing myself to be courageous, honorable, and brave on the battlefield, I have hidden the true essence of who I am. My deepest self remains unseen. There is more to me than being a prince and a soldier.
This is difficult for me to write, but I must. My orientation towards men, an integral aspect of my identity. It does not singularly define me but is an important part of my being.
Like many, I have been denied the right to live authentically. Concealing this truth has hindered my ability to lead a life of true fulfillment. Compelled to remain in the shadows, a constant fear of exposure and the ensuing consequences has haunted me, and plagued my existence. My experiences, not unlike those shared by others like me, entail a life marked by suffocation, fear, and punishment.
Dominic and I always knew that you would surpass us in strength, intelligence, and dependability. Your independent spirit and remarkable achievements stand in stark contrast to our failings. I regret my actions will now compel you to surrender your independence and bear the consequences of Dominic’s and my collective shortcomings. Please, if you can, find it in your heart to forgive Dominic and me for failing you.
My apologies for this rambling correspondence. I have neither the time nor the will to organize it properly. Emotionally spent, I shall continue the best I can.
Most of my life I have lived with a premonition, the belief I would meet a tragic end, one of my making. As the decades passed, my ability to conceal my truth led to complacency, though not carelessness. All the while, our family has tiptoed on this tightrope, fearing the revelation of my secret. Your faithful kindness, love, and support have been a beacon of hope for which I am grateful and have gained strength.
I must confess, dear brother, I am aware of your secret as well. Aramis, Joe, and others come to mind. Yet, you have been more judicious than I in navigating our mutual complexities. You are blessed with the capacity to love both men and women. Your ability to have children has shielded you from suspicion.
Imprisoned in my reality has significantly affected my marriage and subsequently distorted my perception of self. Every day of my life I have trudged on, haunted, knowing the revelation of who I am would cause society to label me unfit, a sinner, a beast, rather than a man. I did not choose this path; it is simply how I was created. I digress and ramble on—
Coming to terms with who I am has been an emotionally taxing journey. Despite the challenges, there have been brief, very special chapters in my life. I have reveled in the compassion and passion of other men. My path has been punctuated with moments of intimacy and romance. Yet regrettably, those fulfilling encounters were destined for disruption by circumstances beyond my control.
I refuse to subject myself to the torment of societal judgment any longer. I must preserve what little remains of my dignity and avail myself of an opportunity to leave behind an acceptable legacy.
You so wisely laid the foundation for a better life for others early on, when you snatched up the poor living on our estates, promising them a future with the creation of the Aurelio Academy.
There is more to be done.
I hope that during your reign, you will strive to enhance the empire for the betterment of all its inhabitants. Perhaps you will discover ways to make life a bit more manageable for people like us. The love you enjoy, the respect, and, in some circles, admiration, make you a powerful figure. As my last request, I implore you to leverage your well-earned reputation and influence to improve the lives of your people, especially those disenfranchised, contributing to your already remarkable successes.
I know you will embrace my request, for it is the essence of who you are, my dear Braxton.
God bless you.
Your Loving Brother,
John